It's all about what you call it!!!

A while ago, I tried to introduce fresh ground whole wheat pancakes to my kids. They were not impressed. I tried again the other day, but this time I had an idea. When they think pancakes, they think of pancakes made with krusteaz pancake mix. So this time I called them flapjacks, and told them the pioneers ate them (or something like them). We have had them for breakfast every morning this week because they love them...
 Ingredients:
1 c whole wheat pastry flour (ground white wheat)
1 t baking powder (aluminum free)
1/2 t salt
1/2 t cinnamon
1 T sugar
1 1/4 c milk (give or take depending upon how thick
you like your pancake batter.
Mix and cook on a hot griddle. Makes about 9 medium pancakes.
Top with applesauce and cinnamon sugar or jam.

Kayden this last month or so...

So this last month when I have been so overwhelmed, we have done lots of things, and here is some of what Kayden has been up to:
Kayden has really enjoyed his compound bow. He and his Grandpa made a target to practice on. The hardest thing is finding a time when no other kids are around so he can practice...

Kaydens Hawaii cousins came to visit for about a week and a half. He had a taste of what it's like to be a big brother to more than one kid...he liked it...some of the time! =)

My friend gave us tickets to UVU's Owls baseball game. Kayden had fun harrassing the players and running up and down the hill we were sitting on. However when the game started and he had to be still, the fun was over for him! He gets bored really fast!

Kayden did most of the lawn mowing this summer. Maybe next summer he will be ready to take on a few lawns! He has done a great job. I love to send him out to play, and hear the lawn mower start up. It makes me one proud Mama!!

One fun thing about being homeschooled are the things we randomly do. A couple weeks ago I heard about this science demonstration at the University of Utah. It sounded amazing so we just picked up and went. Kayden loved it, he learned a bit about astronomy and physics!

Ramblings

It has to be a law of nature that if something is seriously wrong in your personal universe, that opens you up to be magnetized towards other disasters. That seems what is going on here. There is a massive struggle going on right now. The main struggle is not mine, but my struggle is holding everything together during the crisis. Common decency would dictate that when a person is down it doesn't seem like that is a good time to kick him in the most vulnerable spot there is, especially if you are close enough to do serious harm. That is exactly what happened today. What progress has happened with the original problem has been erased and magnified by something almost worse! I am trying to be Christlike and I am trying to come up with the right thing to do/react! And all I want to do is call someone up and let them know exactly what they have done...which I can't do because it would only make the whole situation worse! Honestly I have no words that describe the miriad of thoughts and feelings that have been running through my head, they run the spectrum. I am livid that someone I love who would never purposely hurt another person got so hurt. I feel betrayed that everything we have done for that person means nothing. I feel sorry for the smallness of character of that one person. I don't want to stoop to the same level. I am worried sick about the person who is already barely making it in more that one way. I want to avoid a certain group of people and totally withdraw from a certain area of my current life...which isn't even an option. That is just the surface of what I feel and think right now. I am holding onto my Faith with every ounce of strength I have left. It is what will and is getting me through. I wish I could help my hurt loved one hold on too!

School update for me:

So I have heard that I may not need to take college algebra. Wouldn't that be nice! My enrollment counsellor is worthless...I heard this from my sister, and he has nothing to say except that my transcripts probably will not be evaluated until next month. My sister took the same statistics class I did, and no college algebra. Hmmm...
So I have been dreaming, exploring, and planning. The path I think I am going for is to continue with my masters, then get my FNP. With my FNP I can take any direction I want to, rather than be stuck in one area. Now whether I need to get a doctorate, I don't know...The school community is up in the air and in flux regarding the need for NPs vs DNPs. There is a push to outlaw NPs, and it should go in place by 2015. So, we will see if it is a post masters certificate or a doctorate I need later...I can get no straight answers! That's okay, I have time. This is so exciting to have this dream actually feel attainable! I can visualize it happening! It is going to be a lot of work, but I can do it! Having this dream is getting me through a rough time.

Homeschool...no, Prep School!

So my homeschool is constantly evolving and developing. It has a new focus that is helping me AND Kayden so much! A better term for our home school is Prep School. This homeschool experience is to help prepare him for college. He and I discussed this in great detail, and he is really excited! It has given him a total paradygm shift. Instead of giving him assignments just so I can torture him, I am actually giving him projects to prepare him for college! Nothing really has changed, but with a goal in mind, he has changed. He is doing much better work, and is more willing to do his best. I figure there are really 4 important subjects here...the ability to write well, being able to efficiently pull important information out of reading, math, and computer literacy. That is school down to bare basics. Studying science, history, literature, etc. are all included in this. I am psyched! I feel like it is a continuation of the school that was developed by my parents. The end goal I have in mind is for Kayden to have his bachelors degree by the time he is ready to go on his mission! What a gift to be able to give him!!!

Project TV addiction...a success!!

So a few weeks ago, I wrote about cutting back on tv and wii because
Kayden was seriously addicted. It has been amazing. I allow him a certain amount sometimes, I am able to reward (or entertain--babysit) as needed with it, but the NEED to always be doing it is gone. He has learned to entertain himself and to do other things on his own!!! I forgot that we had the problem until I was just scanning through my previous posts and saw this one! I love realizing that I do have little successes here and there...

Growing pains...

I haven't written for a while for a few reasons. First it is hard to find the time. I have seriously been running as fast as I can all day long every day. I like to be busy, but I am busier than ever. It will be nice when I don't have to log in 3-4 hours at work daily. Right now I could use the extra hours.
Second I am kind of going through a hard time right now. I am okay, but my immediate impulse is to withdraw and shut down where I can. It is a private struggle, so I am not going to blog about it. It's very emotionally draining and if I dwell on it it is easy to feel lost. However, I find I need to hold on to the gospel and to the promptings of the Spirit. I am starting to get some promptings that feel right but I think will be hard to follow through on.  Life really isn't very simple right now. I am feeling the growing pains very well. Burying the issues isn't going to help, I need to dig through and work it out. It would be so easy to try to bury it back up and not deal with it.

The days aren't long enough

I have so much to share, the last few days have been so busy! I just have had no time, and I am working as efficiently as possible. After next week I will have more time since I won't be putting in full time hours. I have been putting in very full weekends and then trying for 3 hours a day. That takes a lot of effort. However I am really liking the direction I am taking at work. My focus is student education, both educating the students and coming up with lesson plans, and working as a resource for the Nurse Case Managers. That is right up my alley...I love to work directly with students and it fits what I need. This makes me the Nurse Student Education Specialist...I like the sound of that!!! Hopefully soon I can catch up here. I have been doing so much with the kids and helping Shaun and exploring school possibilities and just life. It's been crazy =)

Reading and writing program

At the soccer game, I met a lady who shared her favorite program for teaching reading and writing. I honestly have no idea where Kaitlyn is. Some days she won't put 2 sounds together, other days she will read half the words in a book. This program is well put together, and simple, funny and free. It is definitely worth a try.There is a little book that she and I read together, and then there are interactive exercises for writing.www.progressivephonics.com is the link for this program! Wish us luck!!!

Project: TV/Wii addict recovery

I've got just a wee (wii) bit of a problem, my son is addicted to tv. It doesn't matter what is on the tv, a show for Kaitlyn, a commercial, the news...whenever it is on, he zones out. When he doesn't know what to do he wants to watch tv, or play wii. He gets mad anytime I say no. I have had enough!  I discussed my problem with Shaun. Shaun is really hesitant to put a restriction on the kids that he wouldn't like for himself. Shaun's only way to wind down is to also watch tv. However, I explained the problem and we talked about a few possible solutions. He didn't like the "no tv for a week,"solution. My next idea was that he can have an hour a day...give or take according to my discression. This does give a little bit of freedom on my part, if we want a family movie, or if I want to reward with it I can. It's time for Kayden to find other ways to entertain himself. We'll see, the next few days might be a little rough.

Soccer!

Shaun and I took the kids to a homeschool soccer group. It was wonderful! The kids had an amazing time...surprisingly Kayden really seemed to enjoy it! He went from never having played to really participating and working with the team.

Kaitlyn was really funny to watch. She ran with her group, but didn't really connect. When she ran she had her airplane arms out. She had fun too, and that was what really mattered to me.

For me what was wonderful was seeing all these normal (I know what is normal?!) people who all homeschool their kids. Whenever I saw homeschoolers up in Oregon, so many of them were social misfits that I had very little in common with. There was none of that here! I have felt so isolated around here, and it turns out that there is a very large homeschool community full of people who are full of passion and who I have so much in common just below the surface. I am pretty excited about this!

Fun at Discovery Park

Confession: I am a park grinch. I really hate going to parks. I have avoided

going to them like the plague. Today however I found a park I was really impressed with, Discovery Park in Pleasant grove. It is huge and made for kids. It is age appropriate for my kids right now. It is almost all made of wood and looks like a pilgrim fortress that has been kidified. I really don't like parks that are all metal and garish colors. Both of my kids loved it too, though Kaitlyn had the most fun. I think we are going back soon!

To act or to be acted upon...there is a difference!

Every once in a while I get one of those A-HA moments where something I have heard or believe becomes something I know or something that hits reality. I learned something about myself last night. I had some time where I was putting recent puzzle pieces together about my recent past and experiences, and suddenly something became very clear to me. I really dislike having choices made or nearly made for me. I get resentful when someone makes decisions for me or corners me into a place where those decisions are practically made. However, if I am given the same (or similar) circumstance, while my choice might be the same, it truly makes a difference for me to make the choice, rather than for someone to choose for me. I have a feeling that this is a strong point in the make-up of my character. I get the impression that I fought very hard in the pre-earth life for this, because it is such an issue for me here. I suddenly can see this very clearly in every aspect in my life right now. I don't know if this makes much sense to anyone, but to me it is revelatory!

My little herb garden

I love plants! I love the different colors of flowers and folage, but I think out of all the plants I planted this year, I love my little herb garden the most. I have basil, thyme, rosemary, curry

and tricolored sage. Every time I walk by I gently crush a leaf and smell the spicy/sweet oils on my fingers. I love to cook with them, especially the basil. I wish I could have them available all year...

A little peace!

Shaun and I went on a date tonight. It wasn't anything special really, and there was no occasion, we just got away for a couple of hours. It felt so good to be me and him. It's sad that it is so hard to do, but it is so important. We are each creating 2 different lives going in 2 different directions. It's amazing how sharing a few common hours together here and there is enough to knit those 2 different paths. I really do love him a lot. I wish it could be easier to spend time together, but it just isn't. It helps so much to have a common goal that we are working on that is more than just the here and now.

Tonight we went to Cafe Rio, one of our favorite restaurants. It's the only mexican type restaurant that Shaun will go to, and I will take what I can get!! I had pork tamales, and Shaun had his usual, pork burrito.Then we went to Riverwoods to just walk around. They have fun little misting machines set up and it is very well decorated and has a mini rock stage in the middle of the courtyard. They have posh little stores there. The only ones I felt like going into were William-Sonoma (I do love cooking gadget stores!) and Blickenstafs, an upscale toy store. It got me thinking that I really do need to start gathering little things here and there to make Christmas nice.

So we spent a really nice, relaxed couple of hours together. We talked about anything and nothing at all. We had moments of nice companionable quiet just walking around arm in arm. I married an amazing man, and despite (possible because of) everything we have been through lately, I love him more and more! I feel so blessed!!! (I know, sappy, huh? But then a little bit of sap here and there makes it so that this is more than just a passing, superficial thing. There is nothing short-term here, we're in for the extremely long haul!)

Math--grumble, grumble

So I was hoping I wouldn't have to have any math requirements for this program I am looking into. I talked to the enrollment counselor yesterday, and sure enough, I need college algebra. I kind of expected it because it seems to be a requirement everywhere, but I was holding out hope. So I think I am going to get enrolled at BYUs independent study starting with intermediate algebra, and then I'll take college algebra. The last time I did algebra was when I was a teenager eons ago. Maybe my mind has matured and I can look at it as a game or something...Let's see how fast I can get through these 2 classes!